Will you wait for the one that’s truly yours?

July 12th 2022, 20:59, Mayfair

A quick glance at my instagram will reveal something about Tumi – she loves fashion. To be specific, I adore classic luxury pieces that can be reused multiple times. A few weeks ago I shared a funny story on Instagram of my quest to find a specific mule from Christian Louboutin. I was browsing the Harrods sale when I saw these gorgeous mules with a 40% discount. Given the hefty discount coupled with the fact that it was a classic piece I was sold – I needed the item desperately. For those of you who don’t follow me on Instagram (please do because I’d love  to share more with you) the day ended with me running to Mayfair because they supposedly had one more pair in stock. I got there and unfortunately, the pair I’m after is on hold for another client. One word – heartbroken!

Now let’s continue the story. The next day I was speaking to someone via DMs and she said that if the shoe was truly mine, I would find it. It sounds cliche but I’ve found this to be very true over the years. If it’s meant to be it’s not something I will have to struggle to get.

The next day I wake up and realise that ‘London Sample Sale’ is running an exclusive partnership with Christian Louboutin for their sale. To give you some context I can’t remember the last time I got an email from them so I was excited that perhaps I’d get to buy the shoes after all. I open the email and guess what I see that’s part of the catalogue – the same exact shoe I was dying to have. I scream and immediately respond asking if they have the shoe in a size 40. I go to bed hoping and praying that I’d get lucky.

I wake up to an email where I’m told that the shoes are unfortunately extremely popular and hence, they don’t have any sizes available. Obviously this was not what I was expecting to hear so I put the thought of purchasing shoes away and decided that perhaps God doesn’t want me to have it. Later that night I’m speaking to my best friend on the phone and I randomly check my email. The owner of the London Sample Sale had emailed me. By some stroke of luck they had found one pair of size 40 and were going to courier it down from Birmingham to London. She was emailing me to check if I’d be happy to go and try on the shoes in their Mayfair boutique. I screamed at the top of my voice (dramatic, I know) and quickly responded ABSO-FREAKIN-LUTELY. 

The next morning, I’m a little flustered because she hasn’t responded. Are the shoes still available? Should I rush off to Mayfair now to pick them up? All sorts of questions flood my thoughts. I decided to be patient and focus on my monster to-do-list. I wasn’t about to make a trip to Mayfair again without getting confirmation that the shoes were indeed there. 

Later that morning I got an email from her and I saw the preview which read “I have some bad news”. You know it’s not good news when you see the email starting with such an introduction. Well, it turns out that in the process of sending the shoes down to London the staff in Birmingham had accidentally sold the shoe to another client. Sigh. I read the email and of course, I was deflated. 

My birthday was 2 days away and I was already rejoicing that God had given me another early birthday gift. Seeing that I was so close to getting the shoes made it sting a little bit more. Why my pair? I shrugged it off and decided I would move on. If God doesn’t want me to have this pair it means there’s something better in store for me.

The next day, which was the eve of my birthday, I was on my phone again. I randomly checked my emails and the owner of London Sample Sale had sent me a message again. Guess what? They (Christian Louboutin) had found another pair of size 40! They wanted to know if I’d like to try them on. I was in disbelief! Where on earth did they find the shoe? I had checked with Harrods earlier in the day and their system showed there were no more sizes left! I confirmed for the third time that I’d love to try on the shoe and set out at ~6pm towards Mount Street. 

On my journey to the boutique I couldn’t sit still. I was super excited! Another gift, I thought. I started planning the testimony and my ‘TPC reveal’ story. I was excited to talk about my hope being fulfilled. I finally got what I really wanted! I was really bubbling with excitement. As I got closer to the store my heart started beating. It seemed a little too good to be true. As I asked for the size 40 I felt a little bit embarrassed because the sales associate who attended to me was the same person who had told me to move on because there was no size 40 left. I told him politely that I was after a 40 and I believe they had been put on hold for me. As he went to the stock room I was nervous – was this a prank? Did she make a mistake? What if it’s been sold again? All sorts of questions flooded my mind.

After about 5 minutes he returned with a box. I opened my mouth – am I dreaming? They actually had a 40. He politely asks if I’d like to try them on and naturally I reply of course. He brings them out of the box and hands me the pair of shoes.

I freeze. I look down at the shoes and they look small. Oh my goodness.

I take a deep breath and decide to try. The sales associate tells me that they run slightly small because they’re quite narrow. I wiggle my feet in them and manage to slide the shoes on. They fit but as I look carefully in the mirror I realise that there’s a tiny bit of my foot hanging out. They’re not my size. I’m usually a size 40 but if I wore these in public people would think my feet got bigger and now they don’t fit the old shoes I bought. It’s almost as if I had outgrown the shoe. 

Multitaski 70, I guess you weren’t meant to be baby :'(

I try sliding them in further – nothing. The sales associate tells me that the shoe will expand. It’s leather so it’ll stretch slightly and my feet will slide further down therefore it will fit better over time. Fair enough. Maybe it won’t be so bad in the future. But how long will I have to walk around uncomfortably with my feet hanging awkwardly outside? How long will I have to be in pain as I wait for the leather to stretch to accommodate my feet? The fact was that at this point in time my feet are too big for the shoes! Or put differently, the shoes are too small for me.

I walk to a nearby sofa and sit down. I grab my phone and call my best friend (duh). Unfortunately she doesn’t pick up so I’m faced to make a critical decision alone – do I buy these shoes just because I want them so badly and I’ve already planned the testimony of how I scored the shoes? Or do I pass on this shoe and keep waiting for one that fits me perfectly? 

People may read this and think it’s a no brainer – don’t buy the shoe! But you’d be surprised. Many of us take things that don’t quite fit us because we are so desperate to show that we got something*. When you pray for something earnestly and it finally comes, and to your surprise it appears ‘smaller’ than you thought it would, it takes courage to walk away and trust that God will give you something better at His appointed time.

Deep right? I know. I saw the shoes and even though I really wanted them, I knew my feet were too big for the shoe. It was time to move on. I took them off and handed them back to the sales associate. He politely told me that they rarely make shoes of that sort in a 41 (which is what I would need). I politely ignored the comment and knew that 41/42/43 – whatever my size, I would find another pair of shoes for my feet. It would be one that fits perfectly.

***

It’s crazy how deep this story is. LOL. Shoes! Yet God used it to minister to me about various parts of my life. I’ve been here before – wanting to accept something that didn’t quite fit just so I could say that I got something*. This can manifest in our careers e.g. waiting on God for a job and you finally get one but you know it’s not quite what He told you it would be. However, you’re afraid to reject the job because you can’t see any other one in sight. Or in our relationships: waiting on God for your spouse and you meet this dream person, yet there’s just something tiny that makes you feel like he or she doesn’t fit you perfectly. However you tell yourself at least if I marry him or her I won’t be single again and I can give my testimony.

You know what makes me laugh? The shoe almost* fit. In fact it fits, but there’s a tiny* part of my foot hanging out. Yet I knew that if I bought the shoe that tiny thing is probably all I’d be able to see when I look in the mirror. This is my way of saying be honest with yourself. It may seem ‘tiny’ but is it really tiny? When God blesses us He gives us exceedingly and abundantly (Ephesians 3:20). God doesn’t give us defective gifts. A blessing is a blessing. If you ever feel in your heart that there’s something not quite right about something – pause and pray before making any decision.

FYI this message was tough for me to receive too. I hope this gives you courage to keep waiting until you see God’s true gift. Keep waiting until you get what’s truly yours. 

The one that’s yours will fit you perfectly.

Love,
T

P.s. They that wait truly get something better 😉 A few months later I bought a classic pair of Louboutins (Taralita 85) and they are absolutely beautiful. Don’t settle, wait for what’s truly yours.

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